Letting Go
by Arami Heartilly
Summary: When Sephiroth is finally sent back into the relms of memory for good, Cloud is faced with a decision about his future with Tifa.CloudXTifa
1. crossroads

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or advent children; they are the property of squarenix. No money has or will exchange hands as this story was written purely for entertainment value. All original characters and storylines belong to me. Thank you.

A big Thank you to Sally for betaing this for me! This is something I haven't really attempted before with a story before so her help means a lot. Any way, on with the story.

* * *

Letting go. 

By Arami Heartilly.

Tifa had watched him go, as he had many times before and sighed with the regret that she knew only too well. Another job meant that he was away again and she was left with her own silent heartbreak. She had thought that maybe, just maybe, this time his heart would open up to hers.

Almost two months later she found herself in near enough the same position as she had been before Kadaj and his gang had tried, and in part, succeeded in bringing forth their 'reunion'. Watching him fight with his nemesis Tifa was sure that he would finally become the man she'd always thought him capable of, he just seemed to be taking his time getting there.

"I don't know why I bother anymore." Tifa muttered to herself as she finished up the accounts from the day before. Seventh heaven had brought in more business than she had dreamed of and it kept her busy, something she needed in order so survive.

"Tifa!" Marlene called as she ran towards her, her ponytail swinging behind her. "Someone is here to see you." When she looked up she saw his unmistakable red cloak waft through her doorway and his crimson eyes fix on hers in that probing way they always seemed to.

"Vincent! I didn't expect to see you until Yuffie's party, is everything ok?" she asked, stroking Marlene's hair as the girl sat down besides her on one of the bar stools.

"I came to see Cloud, I managed to get hold of some information he's been looking for." Tifa shook her head and let out a controlled breath.

"Cloud's not here, he left about an hour ago. He's got a long distance delivery and won't be back for a week." She told him, trying not to meet his eyes; she didn't want him to know how hurt she was.

He nodded and turned, almost as if to leave. Then, as if remembering why he was there in the first place, he walked towards them and handed Tifa a large brown envelope.

"Please make sure Cloud gets this as soon as he returns."

She nodded before asking,

"Do you want to stay for a drink?" She feared he would leave, that she would be left alone yet again without another one of her friends.

He seemed to think about it for a few seconds before looking at her again and nodding, being a man of few words he simply decided to take the stool next to Marlene, who smiled up at him.

Vincent looked at the girl before him. With her hair the way it was she looked oddly like Aeris but it seemed she'd also picked up a lot from Tifa, especially the way she smiled.

"Vincent, do you live in the ancient capital?" she asked as Tifa went behind the bar.

He nodded, "Yes." His answer was, in true style, short, yet the little girl didn't seem at all bothered by this at all and continued with her questions.

"Don't you ever get lonely?" The question was innocent but for some reason Vincent could not find the words to reply.

Tifa caught his eye and for a second and saw something she had never seen in them, something the little girl had missed.

"Ah… Coffee?" She asked, turning the conversation away from him. He nodded turning to face the floor. The little girl looked confused but before she had time to dwell on it, Tifa spoke,

"Marlene, you and Denzel need to get going, school starts in an hour!" she said, sounding somewhat motherly. Vincent smiled inwardly; she seemed happy with the children.

Marlene sighed, dropping down from her stool, "Goodbye Vincent…. Denzel!!!!" she called, running up the stairs to her room and waving to their visitor before she was out of sight.

Placing the steaming coffee down in front of him, Tifa couldn't help wondering why he had looked so heart broken before. She'd always thought he liked being alone… he'd fought with them but never seemed to enjoy conversation or group activities. She wanted to ask what had changed but she didn't; it wasn't her place.

"Thank you." He commented, drinking the hot coffee before seemingly choosing to stare at his own reflection in the marbled bar surface.

"It's good to see you, it's been quiet around here lately." She told him. "I mean, there has been plenty of business… but Cloud's away a lot and the children spend most of the day at school." Part of her knew that she was rambling but Tifa knew that he wouldn't mind. He seemed to be a listener rather than an active speaker, which suited her just fine. At least someone was there for her to talk to.

"I think that's probably why Yuffie is having her party." He sighed, "She seemed to think it would help me to 'get out more'." Tifa giggled, covering her mouth and leaning back against the counter.

"I wouldn't take it too personally – she's like that with _everyone_." She told him, realizing that this was probably the first time she and Vincent had ever joked about something.

* * *

Vincent had stayed for most of the day, not saying too much, but just enough so that Tifa didn't feel so alone as she cleaned the bar and sorted out all the bills and such. He had, however, drank several cups of coffee and seemed to be more preoccupied than usual. 

"Vincent…. Do you ever miss the adventure?" she asked, once she had finished everything she was supposed to do.

It took him a while to answer, and she considered that he might not speak on the subject at all, but he did and what he said surprised her.

"At one time in my life it was all I lived for, the thrill of the fight and the adventure…. But it cost me something I could never replace." He sighed, sounding almost as sad as he had looked before. His openness surprised her; he rarely spoke about his past to anyone.

"But you fought with us when we freed you from the mansion." She noted tentatively, she didn't want to overstep the mark.

He nodded "I still had something to fight for… now I fight when I need to, it no longer drives me the way it used to… I lost that along time ago."

Tifa bit her lip and looked at him, wanting to see his eyes again, needing to know if he still hurt… the grief in his voice seemed so familiar, something she could almost feel.

'Cloud' she thought. What Vincent was describing was the grief she felt over Cloud, maybe not under the same circumstances… but she had lost the one person in the world she had ever truly loved to his memories… he might have cared for her… but she didn't know what he really felt, deep down in his heart. 

"I'm sorry Tifa, I didn't mean for anything I said to disturb you..." He told her, finally looking at her. But she hadn't noticed. She was too caught up in her pain to realize that he was in front of her.

She looked up sharply, burying her feelings and emotions before they could show in her eyes. She was too slow, however, and he saw it on her face and in the way her shoulders tensed and brow creased.

"I ... I'm sorry, I missed what you said." Vincent took a step back and regained his seat at the bar. Watching her closely he understood some of the hurt she tried to hide; the way it would work it's way into your heart and your soul until it controlled you… loves darker side had a way of taking over and consuming everything in it's wake.

He thought it best to lighten the mood, bring her back up to normal. The children would be home from school soon and they didn't need to see their mother in her current state.

"It was nothing really, just try and take care of yourself Tifa. Enjoy the peace whilst it's here." He stood, brushing the invisible creases from the cloak that hung around his shoulders.

Attempting a smile, Tifa nodded.

"I'll pass on your information to Cloud." She told him knowing that he would be leaving shortly.

"Ask him to come and see me when he returns… my cell is out of battery." She would have commented on the fact he could have charged it anywhere but she recognized the undertone in his words.

"I will."

"Thanks for the coffee." He told her finally before walking out of the door, turning to her with a knowing look on his face before it closed behind him.

* * *

The peace of the road had always felt like a sanctuary to him, no one was judging or watching him and he had time to think. Although the subject of his latest thoughts was going to take more than this journey to get through, he'd spend the last eight weeks doing the same thing. 

Tifa.

The woman he shared a house with, cared for two children with…. His best friend. For such a long time he had known her that way, but there had also been a point in his life that he had seen her as something more. But guilt had clouded his feelings; taken over his life for such a long time that he didn't know how he felt anymore.

Which is why he had taken any long distance delivery that had been offered, the only trouble was he knew the distance he was creating between himself and his family may soon become too much. He ran the risk of hurting her again… but surely she could understand? She always had before.

When he finally noticed that darkness had descended upon him he was nearing the chocobo farm. Deciding it was best to stay there for the night he drove towards the stables that he still rented – Tifa had convinced him that it would be good for the children and so far she had been right. _Tifa is always right when it comes to them…_ he reminded himself.

Settling himself down in the empty stable that he'd set up a camp bed and stove in, his thoughts drifted to her once again… the stirring in his heart, which he experienced every time she crossed his mind, was it love?

"_You should go home you know, she won't wait forever." _A voice whispered in the dark but Cloud was drifting between sleep and wake; he was unsure whether what he saw was real or not.

"I just need time." He breathed his reply.

"_Why? Are you afraid?"_

But there was no reply and his companion let herself fade back to the life stream once again.

* * *

Any comments or suggestions on the story or my writing style ar every much appreciated. Thank you for reading 


	2. one step at a time

Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy VII or Advent children; they are the property of squarenix. This story was written purely for entertainment value and no money has or will exchange hands. All original characters and storylines belong to me. Thank you.

* * *

Chapter 2, One step at a time

Anyone observing her would have thought her asleep. But Tifa was far from it, her silent tears left growing puddles in her soft pillows and her hands screwed the sheets from underneath the cotton surface.

She hadn't meant to cry, it had been so long since she last cried over him… but something about the day just passed had opened her aching heart and freed her tears. What Vincent had told her had struck a chord in her… _I can't do this anymore, I have to find away out of this_.

But their situation left her trapped; they live together – even shared the same room in their house. Then there was the children… she could never leave them and she knew, or at least she hoped she knew that Cloud could never leave them. Her doubt came from the fear that one day he would leave and never come back. as if he thought their life was somewhat better off without him.

"Tifa?" the small voice called from the doorway. She didn't move, hoping the little girl would think she was asleep and go back to bed.

But Marlene approached, her soft footfalls echoing through the otherwise silent room. She climbed on to the bedside facing away from Tifa and gently placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Tifa, Tifa?"

There was no way that she could pretend to be asleep any longer, this was the way the little girl woke her whenever she'd had a nightmare or something had scared her during the night. She just didn't know how to hide her tears.

"What's wrong sweetheart?" Tifa asked her, forcing her voice to stay steady and gentle. She lifted her hand to her face, pretending to wipe sleep from her eyes whilst she removed the tears that lay on her cheeks.

"I can't sleep." Marlene told her as Tifa rolled over to face the young girl wondering if the moonlight was reflecting the few tears that were still left on her face.

"Did you have a bad dream?"

She shook her head "No."

"Then what is it sweetheart?" Tifa could see the little girls mouth start to tremble and she sat up in the bed so she could see her better. "Did something scare you?" she asked, trying to get to the root of the problem, Any hope that Marlene was in one of her forward moods had faded along time ago.

But instead of answering she moved forwards and put her arms around the woman she saw as her mother, pulling her towards her and holding tight.

Taken slightly aback Tifa reciprocated the motion, allowing herself to seek comfort from the little girl as well as provide it. It was the children that kept her together afterall.

"It's alright sweetheart." She whispered.

"I miss him." Her muffled words traveled well in the darkness. "I miss Cloud." There were sobs creeping into her voice and she held the older woman tighter.

"He'll be home soon." Tifa soothed calming her own internal sadness, the last thing she wanted was for the children to know how she felt, they would only worry about her.

"But he said that he'd stop going away like this – he promised."

Stroking her hair Tifa searched for the right things to say and she couldn't find them, she didn't want to lie anymore - she didn't want to make him appear to be more than he was. How could she keep restoring the children's faith in him if she couldn't restore her own?

"He's doing what he thinks he has to do sweetheart, but I'm sure he doesn't mean to make you sad." Her voice had started to waver as she spoke, but she was sure Marlene hadn't noticed, the little girl was holding her so tightly anything said would have been lost.

_You're hurting the children now Cloud, come home soon.

* * *

_

It was the morning when Denzel noticed his sister was missing; the sun was just coming up so it was too early for her to be awake. Having some idea of where she might have gone he got himself out of bed and headed down the hallway in the direction of his parents room.

Sure enough Marlene was sleeping soundly next to Tifa who had her arm protectively round the little girl. His 'mother' had started to stir, something he put down to him being there so he shut the door quietly and now feeling too awake to go back to sleep he headed to the study. It was a place he often found himself in when Cloud went away because it made him feel closer to him and a little less lonely.

He noticed the pile of notes addressed to his 'father' and the parcel that Vincent had brought neatly stacked up at the side of the desk next to the picture of his parents, Marlene, him and their friends – his extended family.

"We thought you'd never leave us again." He told the photograph as he picked up the deliveries log book that held the information on deliveries carried out and to be done. He noticed that for the next few weeks Cloud had penciled in the next few deliveries and every one was at least four days long. _I wonder if Tifa has seen this yet._ Eyeing the pencils left on the table he wondered if it was worth altering the orders… but he didn't want to ruin his parents business.

He would have to think of something else.

* * *

The voice that had whispered in the night had been forgotten by morning but its meaning stayed with him. Even as he continued on towards his destination he couldn't help but feel like he was being pulled in the other direction. But he wouldn't let himself turn around he was still determined to sort out everything in his head.

He was low on fuel as he approached the next town, one of many that had sprung up on the continent since meteor had been destroyed. So he pulled into the first fuel station he saw, noticing that this was one of a chain that Barret had invested in now that his oil venture was paying off.

A young man who worked there approached him and Cloud nodded to indicate that he wanted his bike filled before heading into the small shop attached to the station. He picked up a few supplies for the road; water, food and chocolate. Although the latter was more for Denzel and Marlene, he always returned home with something for them as a means of apology for leaving.

"2200 Gil total for the fuel as well sir." The woman behind the counter told him as she bagged up the food, it was unnecessary but Cloud didn't feel like making a fuss.

His phone started to ring as he headed back towards his bike and he would have ignored it if not for the voice behind him.

"You goin ta answer it?"

Cloud turned to see Cid stood leaning on the wall of the shop, arms crossed infront of his chest.

"Well?" but the ringing had already stopped as he reached for it. The display read 'Tifa'

"I'll call her back." But inwardly he wondered why she hadn't left a message _she always leaves a message. Always._

"You on another delivery?" the pilot asked.

"Yeah, long distance, it'll probably take most of the week." Cloud had started to load the supplies in the compartment next to the swords when he noticed that Cid had walked towards him.

"Look, I parked Sierra on the other side of the town, you wanna lift?" he offered, he'd heard from Yuffie and Barret that lately Cloud hadn't been spending enough time with the family. Something was still bothering him even after the battle with Sephiroth.

"I don't want you to go out of your way." The younger man told him running his hand through his blonde hair in an effort to fix some of the damage caused by the wind on the way there.

"Incase you haven't noticed… with the airship nothin much is outa my way. It'll mean you get back to the family earlier and surprise them."

He hesitated slightly, but couldn't stop the shiver that went through him with the mention of family. He missed them, more than he thought he would and he missed her. He looked to Cid, unsure of what his answer was going to be.

But Cid took it as a yes. "Come on, you can bring the bike, there's room. You'll have time to call her on the way too."

Cloud followed wordlessly, wondering how he was going to sort himself out in time.

* * *

Denzel was the only one in the bar when the visitor walked in, the door was open but Seventh heaven was closed for another half an hour. He looked up to tell the visitor to come back but he stopped when he recognized who it was.

"Tifa, Vincent's here." He called into the back rooms then he pulled himself up onto the counter as the cloaked man approached. "Hi"

"Good morning." Vincent sat at the bar a short distance from the boy, who was observing him somewhat curiously.

"I'm sure she'll be down in a few minutes, she's helping Marlene with something." He explained, knowing that it was unnecessary to do so but that Tifa would want him to. She didn't like to keep anyone waiting without good reason.

"It's fine. I can wait." He wondered if he should say anything else, but couldn't think of anything he really wanted to say anyway. In truth he was unsure why he'd come back but he wanted to make sure his friend was alright.

"Sorry to keep you waiting." Her voice carried down the stairs and she appeared in the doorway with Marlene holding her hand. The little girl waved her hello as Tifa lead her to the front of the bar.

"Denzel do you and Marlene want to go to the shops for me?" she asked, they both nodded. "Alright, take some money from the till. I need milk and chocolate." Neither of them questioned the request and after Denzel took the Gill and Marlene hugged Tifa they hurried on their way, waving to Vincent as they did.

"Is everything okay?" she asked when the children had gone.

Vincent nodded. "I came to see if you had heard from Cloud."

"Oh…" she trailed off, her mood visibly changing. "No, nothing since he left, why is there something important he should know about – I can try to call him."

"No, I just." He paused, inwardly conflicted. Should he offer the help he wanted to? Was it even his place? But it was evident in her eyes and her manner that she needed to talk to someone about this.

"Tifa, I've been there. Different reasons and another time, but I know some of what you must feel. I'm offering you someone to talk to. If you want it."

Her eyes were wide, totally taken back by his offer. He immediately regretted his decision to speak and was about to retract his words when she spoke as steadily as she could manage.

"Last night, Marlene came to see me almost in tears. She couldn't sleep because she missed him so much. To her he is as much of a father as Barret … but he at least calls her and I don't know what to do when it comes to Cloud. I can't lie to her – I don't know when he's coming home this time – or when he will leave again." She took a deep breath, finally glad to be voicing all her concerns that she'd been hiding from her friends.

"And Denzel, he's different because he knows what's going on, he pretends to understand as much as I do but Cloud is _his_ father. His name is on the adoption papers… and I see this look in his eyes this past few weeks. He misses him as much as his sister but doesn't know how to let it out--"

"What about you?" Vincent interrupted, his words completely silencing her.

"I...I..." she stuttered, pushing her silken hair behind her ears and looking to the floor. She saw no point in hiding her feelings, she trusted Vincent to never let this pass anywhere but between the two of them.

"I honestly don't know what to do with myself recently. I thought he was going to come home to us… but although he lives here… he doesn't really live with us." she paused as she tried to calm herself down and stood, walking behind the bar with her fists rested on the table. "I don't check the logs book anymore because I don't want to know how many more weeks he's going to do this for – or if this is how it's going to be forever."

Vincent could see that she was visibly shaking, her knuckles were white against the counter and her eyes hadn't left its dark surface. He followed behind the bar and stood a small distance from her, not wanting to invade her space but wanting there to be someone there. _Something she hasn't had from him… something I never had…_

"I keep hoping, praying that he will come back to me… the Cloud I used to know… the one I… the one I…" the strength in her arms left her and her elbows buckled, her shaking legs threatened to bring her to the ground, but strong arms surrounded her and held her steady.

Tifa met his eyes and for the first time she saw in their red depths what she knew he could see in hers. The haunting pain of a love unrequited or impossible… both had their own way of destroying the person woven into feelings they could not escape.

He pulled Tifa gently towards him allowing her the comfort of another being to soothe her troubled soul. She herself clung to him, noticing the warmth she had never before associated with Vincent. It came as such a shock that it brought tears to her eyes, tears that fell silently as her bodys shaking started to cease.

* * *

"So you goin to call her?" Cid shouted to his blonde haired friend as he heard him approached the bridge. He normally wasn't one to interfere with his friends lives but Cloud was too much of a procrastinator and sometimes needed a little push.

"Yeah." He seemed distracted but never the less Cid could see him take the phone out of his pocket and walk towards the front of the bridge. He was almost out of ear shot… almost.

Cloud looked over to Cid once more before flipping the phone open and dialing Tifas number, unlike him she always tried to answer the phone so he found it a little strange when someone else's voice greeted him on the other end of the line.

"_Hi Cloud."_

"Denzel? Is Tifa there?"

"_No, she sent me and Marlene to the shops to pick up some things for her. She's with Vincent back at home." _

This confused Cloud. "Oh… could you ask her to call me when you get back, she called earlier." He could hear Marlene and Denzel muttering in the background and he started to wonder what was going on. It didn't surprise him that Vincent had come to see them, he had information that he needed but _why would she give the phone to their son?_

"_It wasn't Tifa that called Cloud, it was me."_ The little boy sighed on the other end of the phone. _"Because we all really miss you here, I wanted to see if you would come home early."_

He sounded a little afraid and Clouds heart went out to him, he didn't know what to say. The uneasy feeling returned to him, making him shiver despite the heat of the bridge. He turned around to Cid who must have grasped the main point of the conversation he gave the younger man a nod towards the phone.

"I'm sorry Denzel… I'll be home soon Cid is helping me out with my delivery then taking me home. So I'll be back tomorrow."

"_That's great! Tifa and Marlene will be so happy."_ The little boy exclaimed, his happiness bringing a smile to Clouds face, it brought warmth too and he missed it. He missed the children more than he thought he had.

"There's just one thing. I want to surprise her."

"S_o you want me to keep it a secret? No problem. I think I have to tell Marlene though. She wants to talk to you."_ He could hear the smile in the boys voice.

"_You're coming home? You're going to stay this time right?"_ her excited voice came through the other end of the phone.

He didn't know what he was supposed to say to that, could he go home for a while? Could he sort out his feelings for Tifa with her around all the time? He didn't know.

"I'll see what I can do about the delivery schedule."

"_Okay."_ She sounded pacified for now and that Cloud could deal with.

"I have to go now, but I'll see you tomorrow."

"_Good bye Cloud."_ And she was gone.

* * *

"Here." Vincent handed her a steaming hot cup of tea, they were sat in the kitchen. The children had come home over an hour ago and Tifa had held it together long enough to send them upstairs to do their homework. They'd seemed more than willing to do so but it wasn't something she hadn't noticed at the time.

"Thanks." Despite the heat she took a sip letting it warm her up before placing it on the table in front of her.

He simply nodded his appreciation and sat across from her, she'd gotten used to him focusing his attention on her and in an odd way she felt a little more secure than she had in a long time.

"Have you tried to talk this through with Cloud?"

"No, I've tried but all he does is change the subject or push me away. I'm done being patient with him and waiting for him to make his decision… it's like he thinks the rest of us will just wait around for him to do what he wants and I don't want to anymore."

"So then don't."

"What do you mean? It's not as if I can turn these feelings off or leave the children, they're what keep me together." She kept her temper from her voice as she spoke, the raging torrent had slowed somewhat.

"I'm not suggesting that you should. In the end what you choose to do is up to you but I would recommend you talk about this together. If not for you then for the children, don't let him push you around it's your life this is affecting. Not just his."

Tifa gave a quick nod. "I'll try… it's just…"

"It's hard. I know I understand but living your life like this will not get any easier. That I can promise you."

"Vincent?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"If there's anything I can do to thank you for this please let me know."

He smiled, knowing that it was her way, always wanting everyone to be safe and happy. Needing everyone to be content and well as if the world might fall apart if she didn't.

"Do you have somewhere I can charge my cell?" he asked a small smile on his lips.

Alittle surprised by his request she obliged, "There are sockets just over there by the radio." She pointed and Vincent stood, plugging his phone in. "I've been talking to Yuffie and apparently I 'need to get out more' at least this way she might stop her little surprise visits."

Tifa laughed probably for the first time in a while, she enjoyed his company, found comfort in it. And for the first time in a while she could begin to see the light at the end of her tunnel.

* * *

As always constructive critisism and reviews are welcome and appreciated.


	3. Comming home

Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy VII or Advent children; they are the property of squaresoft/ squarenix. This story has been written purely for entertainment value and no money has or will exchange hands. All original characters and story lines belong to me. Thank you.

Note: Sorry for the delay on this chapter, it's taken me a long time to get it how I want it. Hope it worked out well.

* * *

Chapter 3, Comming home

"_There's nothing in your way anymore. No Geostigma to keep you from them, from her."_ The voice whispered in the dark again, once again Cloud was on the verge of slumber inside one of the cabins on the airship.

"I just want to be sure this is what I want." He replied, knowing who he was talking to but his clouded senses couldn't wake him enough to realize exactly what was going on.

"_Don't over think this Cloud, you already know the answers."_

"…" only a mumble escaped his lips and he faded into dreams.

* * *

Denzel and Marlene had woken early in anticipation of Clouds return. As promised they had said nothing to Tifa and tried to act as normally as possible, the fact that Vincent had stayed until late in the evening had helped them to preoccupy their mother greatly. 

"Do you think we should stay here and wait? Or find some excuse to leave the house so he can surprise her alone?" Denzel asked trying to smooth out invisible creases from his shirt.

"I don't know… I don't want to make her feel more lonely than she does; did Cloud tell you when he was going to be here?" the little girl was fixing the pink ribbon in her hair.

"No, but he's with Cid in the airship so he should be here soon."

"Okay, I think we should wait around until he gets here and then leave." Marlene suggested, handing her brother a comb so he could work on his hair. It was part of their normal morning routine but today it felt different and more important.

"DENZEL, MARLENE, BREAKFAST!" came their mothers call from the kitchen. The two children looked excitedly at each other before walking in a near run out of the bedroom door.

* * *

It had occurred to Cid that Cloud had become something of a floor pacer instead of the stoic figure he had been on their adventures. His nerves were showing and even his hands couldn't stay still, to the pilot it was obvious why and it seemed it was beginning to dawn on the blonde haired man as well. 

He'd noticed that Cloud talked in his sleep, murmured Tifa's name in uneasy rest. This hadn't been something he had wanted to discover, but it had been hard to miss in the silence of the corridor outside the cabin that had been given to the young man.

Cid had considered saying something on the matter, trying to make him feel less alone with regards to the way he felt. But he knew the young woman in question was the only one who could help him.

"We'll be at Edge city in about ten minutes, you want me park outside it.?" He asked.

"Yeah, that way she won't know I'm coming."

"You got it." Cid told him, steering the ship in the right direction.

"Your bike's ready in the hold, might want to get yourself down there."

Cloud looked to him, walking towards the main part of the bridge. "Thank you for the lift and the cabin, say hello to Shera for me."

"I will, give my best to Tifa and the children"

The younger man nodded and proceeded out of the door.

* * *

In the times before Cloud had left Edge city Tifa had always looked forwards to their day off that came once a week. It was their family day and the thought of that each week had kept her going through out Denzels illness. This time though it was all she could do to keep herself busy, the children were helping her out with chores which helped to lighten her mood a little… but she knew that even they were no longer convinced by her happy go lucky appearance. 

She's half hoped that Vincent would make another appearance, Tifa now actively enjoyed his company and was looking forwards to talking with him again. Part of her wished that he had opened up earlier in their adventures but she understood why he hadn't; he like all of them had wounds that needed to close and voids that needed to be filled. Then there was Lucreicia, the woman she knew to be Sephiroths mother and at some point someone Vincent had held dear. Pain seemed to be a common link between them all… but it was getting through it that was beginning to bring her – and her friends back together.

After making sure the children were getting on with their self elected task of clearing the tables Tifa headed to the kitchen, her sleeping had become more and more disturbed and she found herself in need of coffee.

She was surprised to find the smell of fresh coffee greet her at the doorway; she was certain that neither her nor the children had put the pot on.

"Tifa." He was leaning against the sink, arms folded loosely and eyes looking straight at her.

"Cloud?" totally taken aback she closed the door behind her and let herself rest against the kitchen surface.

He nodded "I had a little help with one of my deliveries so I came home early." It was a somewhat pitiful explanation and he knew that as well as she did. It wasn't the how he got there early it was why.

"Through the back door?" she asked as her mind whirred with a thousand different questions.

"Ah, yeah. I knew the bar would be closed and that the children would be there and I wanted to talk to you alone." He seemed nervous, like he used to when he was first around the children.

"Oh. How long have you been here?" the question was almost meaningless but she couldn't bring herself to ask what she really wanted to know.

"About ten minutes." She just nodded in response and he took this as his opportunity, "I came back because I want to fix things, clear up the mess I've been making of everything these past few weeks."

Her heart started to beat a little faster and hope fluttered inside, hope that by all rights should have died along time ago. There was still pain residing deeply too and a knowledge that he might not bring the kind of news she wanted to hear… either way Tifa would finally be free of her personal agony.

Cloud looked to her for some sort of response and she remembered what Vincent had said to her, this wasn't all about him, she and the children deserved the truth.

"We've missed you." She told him, choosing to move towards the pot of coffee and taking a mug she poured it until it was almost full. It wasn't until she had finished and he had her attention again that Cloud continued.

"I know… and I know that sorry isn't going to be good enough, but I didn't know what else to do." He was unsure whether he should mention the call with Denzel, but thinking it would divert from what he wanted to say he kept his silence.

"About what?" she kept her voice steady, knowing that she would have to stay calm and not let her emotions run away with her.

His answer wasn't direct and Tifa sensed that this was hard for him, perhaps as hard as it was for her.

"When I left last time it was because of the Geostigma... I didn't want you or the children to see what was happening to me. I didn't want Denzel to see me loosing to the same illness that he was fighting." He sighed, letting his gaze meet hers for a moment "I distanced myself from what we had on purpose – to spare you. But recently I've been having trouble finding my way back."

"What do you mean?"

"Tifa, I never expected to survive so I hadn't considered the future. I'm not proud of it because I know how much I hurt you, Denzel and Marlene but at the time I took any job that would take my mind from you." His clear blue eyes met hers once again, there were emotions Tifa wasn't sure she had ever seen there before. Sorrow and regret.

"Like you're doing now." She commented, trying to understand what it would feel like to know you're going to die at the hands of a disease. But it was impossible.

"I needed time to think, but I wasn't trying to distance myself from you."

This confused her, _not distancing himself? What do you think you're doing to us Cloud – to me?_

He moved the distance between them slowly she watched him wondering what was going on inside him; her anger was simmering and replaced with a tingling feeling that spread through her whole being.

"I was confused... But unlike before the more time I spend away from you the worse it gets."

"From me?" he was right in front of her his startling blue eyes looking straight into hers, the tingling increased with each passing moment and she couldn't move away.

He nodded. "I don't know what to do with myself around you, I don't know how to act or what to say… "

"Cloud?" his eyes had strayed from hers and he was staring at the floor.

"… This is hard for me to explain. Since I came back it's been different, I feel free of the past, of Sephiroth and the stigma and I'm staring to realize what I want." He didn't meet her eyes exactly but tentatively Cloud outstretched his hand and started to brush his fingertips up and down her right arm as his explanation continued.

"Before the battle in the ancient city you told me that the reason we couldn't make everything work was because we're not a real family… I understand that now and I want to be, I want the four of us to be."

Tifa looked to him, catching his gaze and holding it as her mind whirled and she willed him to say more, to let her know what exactly that meant. She was on the brink of tears, no sadness this time but a relief that threatened to overcome her composure. She loved him with such intensity that he scared her, enough love that the pain he had caused could begin to be forgiven if not forgotten.

"Cloud…"

"I'm not going to leave you again Tifa, not like I have been, I've had an offer that means any long distance delivery shouldn't take longer than an over night trip." She nodded, still wavering on the edge as she awaited his explanation when one didn't come she spoke.

"How?"

"Cid offered me some help, for a small commission..." but Tifa was shaking her head smiling at him.

"Oh… you mean…" he stepped ever so slightly closer to her "I want things between us to change, I know that I've put you through more than you deserve and I'm ready to stop running from the way I feel. I want to be with you Tifa… not just live with you. I want _us_ to bring our family up together"

The shock of actually hearing him utter the words she dreamt of started the flow of silent tears down her face; she was still smiling albeit weaker than before. Cloud had taken her hand in his and held it tightly as if waiting for a response.

"We… we have a lot to talk about… I …." But she couldn't say anymore, the anger had faded and the ache in her heart had ceased for the first time in weeks but she couldn't help the small part of her mind that considered this could all go horribly wrong… she couldn't handle him leaving again.

"I know that my apology isn't enough and I know that I haven't made it easy for you in the past but I'll do what ever I can to show I mean this." He told her, he started to sound a little afraid as if her silence meant rejection.

"You just have to be here with us, with me." She said her voice just above a whisper. Her garnet eyes were shining and as Cloud looked deeper into them he saw the hurt and pain he had brought her, but there was forgiveness as well. Seeing this he knew the right decision had been made.

This was where he belonged.

"Tifa…" his words trailed off as he closed the small distance between them and gently pressed his mouth against hers, hearing her soft sigh as he did, releasing her hand he put his arms around her, gently pulling her close to him. She reciprocated enjoying the feeling of warmth and comfort the contact brought her, there was also the slow release of emotions pent up over years of frustration.

The longer their kiss continued the more she wanted and it seemed so did he as she found herself pushed up against the counter with Clouds arms locked firmly around her. Tifas own had started to explore his back as Cloud moved his trail of kisses to her neck there was still trepidation within his movements, her tears had faded and a smile replaced it.

His movements slowed and he pulled back to see her face, she seemed confused that he had stopped.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, worried but not too much. He still held her firmly although she was no longer pressed against the counter.

Cloud smiled something that still managed to take her breath away due to its uncommon appearance.

"No, every thing might finally be ok. I know that there is a lot we need to talk about and a lot I need to do"

"I know and I'm not going to pretend that this will be easy for either of us but when has that stopped us?" she asked, stoking his cheek with the back of her free hand, his cheeks were slightly flushed and for a moment she saw the teenager she used to know, the one innocent to the worlds evils, The boy she had first fallen in love with. "We should go tell the children you're home, they'll be happy to se you came back early."

"They know."

"How?" Tifa had the look in her eyes she often displayed when questioning the children.

"Denzel called me yesterday; he was really worried about you… so I let him know what I was planning." He explained, worrying about her reaction.

"That would explain why I couldn't find my phone, but I didn't really notice, Vincent kept me company for most of the day."

Cloud nodded, "He mentioned that too."

"Should we go and find them?" she asked and he released his hold on her, save from her right hand which he took in his and lead her to the door, towards _their_ family.

* * *

Reviews and constructive critism are very much apreciated. next chapter will be up as soon as possible. 


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